apparently i am seriously hated.
but do you think i care?
i'm a cynic. i never see things in a positive light.
if you think i'm wrong then correct me.
or else you can go fuck yourself.

if you wanna insult you could have at least left your name, you know.
have some BALLS.
oh. wait.
i just remebered.
girls don't have balls.

due to the enormous present debts i owe people, i have only $4 left for next week.
$4.
*sob*

lets see if i can survive on that

my dad is the greatest.
he has fixed the computer table!

YAY!

my bloody computer table broke.
arrggh. i was leaning on the keyboard part for a while when suddenly,

"BLAM"

that stupid keyboard sliding thing gave way.
fuck.
hope my dad doesn't screw me up for this.
gulp.

the newspaper ran a story today on a singaporean guy who was "15 minutes away from death" or something like that. honestly, i wonder why people would care about someone who was 15 minutes away from the vtech massacre. since he was 15 minutes away, what he knew about the killings would only be as much as what we knew about it, so it's really senseless to be interviewing him. just because the dude was from singapore, the papers had to interview him on the incident. its quite sad that our country is trying to sponge on every situation by telling everyone that "WE WERE INVOLVED TOO. YOU KNOW." i'm really tired of reading such news as it really doesn't make me feel proud of my country. on the contrary, i feel disgusted by the fact that we are trying to shamelessly promote ourselves as a big player in the world, which honestly, we aren't. let the people mourn for the dead. instead of writing of singapore's part in the vtech massacre, why not write up of the suffering the family and friends of the killed had to go through. that would have been much more meaningful.

i need to go to the gym.
i am filled with guilt every time i look at my stomach.

running at school is kinda wierd, cos you'd be like running on your own, and everyone would be like, staring at you.
running at the gym is better. no one looks at guys in the gym.
haha

dude.
by now, you should've realized that you're one of the richer kids around. you're able to afford things most of us can't afford. please, spare a thought for the less well to do people around. before you start calling someone a cheapskate, put yourself in his shoes. perhaps the $1 more that you wanted to collect from him, which may have meant little to you, meant a lot to him. perhaps he could've used it for other stuff which is more important. perhaps he didn't have as much money as you do to afford such unwanted stuff. whatever it is. you should just know that you ain't considered average considering the amount of allowance you get.
please.
think before you accuse someone of being a cheapo.






thats it! i should get some chocolate! its cheap & good! definitely much cheaper than some stupid b^%

there is something wrong with me.

recently, whenever i hold a sharp instrument, like a penknife, or a nail, i have the urge to stab it into my eye, or use it to slash my wrist. its a horrid thing to do, but yet i keep having the urge to do so, even though my mind tells me that i shouldn't.

this is really freaking me out.

aknifeinmyeye.

pure bliss.

i got a B for project work

it isn't really good by national standards, but i'm not complaining. (the A grade percentage in other schools are shocking compared to ours, but i won't dwell on it too much or i'll sound like a whiny ass.)

at least i've made good in something in my first year in TPJC. i finally have my first A level exam pass ( all my other friends have 2) which is something i'm really proud of.

i feel kinda sorry for some people who didn't quite get the grades they wanted. hope they'll do in other subjects

will we perform better in our studies if we were in better schools?

we had a discussion on this during recess.
some of us agreed with it, while the rest didn't. they thought that it didn't really matter which school you came from, but whether you were willing to work hard or not. we thought that if we were given a chance to be in a better school, our grades would definitely be better, with the better influence we have around us.


i think it all boils down to peer pressure.

those who succumb to peer pressure are often the ones who would do what their friends do. however such people only see what their friends do in school and thus mimic them throughout the day in whatever they do. but such people (the ones succumbing to peer pressure) often fail to realise that what their friends do at school, they don't do at home. for example, a playful person maybe a hardworking person at home, yet his friends do not know. so when he studies at home, his friends continue to play incessantly thinking that this is what their friend would be doing now. hence their grades suffer.

however if the friend was hardworking (let me cite some of my friends: larry; brandon; nicholas) the peer pressure dude would then think that it is normal to be studying the whole day and hence would adopt a positive attitude towards studying. this would then be evident in their grades.

hence i do think that its the people you choose as friends at school that really determines your academic performance. this justifies my point that being in a better school can help improve our grades. in a better school, there would be less 'slacker' kinds and more mugging people. mix with them and you can be assured better grades.

my friends did argue on the point that if you were stupid, nothing that you do will make you smarter. that is, of course true, but if we put two equally smart and equally impressionable people in contrasting environments, the results would surely show that they'd adapt to their surroundings and behave like their friends.

confident and healthy-ego people who never get influenced by anything but what they want to will never understand how we feel.

my phone is spoilt.
i am devastated.

oh my gawd.
i did this test on colorgenics
it really can judge what kind of person you are from the colors you prefer

this is what they said about me.

You are constantly hoping that your good fellowship and attitude and your 'love for your fellow man (or women)' will give you peace of mind. You need people - people around you to care for you and to show you that they care. It is this hope that keeps you going, the hope that makes you the type of person that indeed you are. Your own need for approval seemingly makes you always ready to help others and in exchange you seek love, warmth and understanding. You will always listen to others and you are open to new ideas which hopefully will prove fruitful and interesting.

Now there are many things in life that you require as essential to your well-being but, try as you may, something always seems to be getting in your way. A word of advice - 'keep trying' and you may be pleasantly surprised to see just how matters turn out.

The way things are, you feel that you are stuck in a rut and there is not much you can do about it. You feel frustrated and inhibited but if you can find a way to let yourself go, you may find that things aren't quite so bad as perhaps you thought they were. One consolation is that since you are an extremely emotional individual, with the right person you may be able to release some of that frustration and tension with some mutual tender loving care.

You are on tenterhooks and appear to be extremely nervous and upset. You are bored and you feel that life has far more to offer than this present day mundane existence. The way that you feel indicates that you have the need for a responsive and understanding relationship. You are prepared to follow up any opportunity which may present itself. However you are very choosy and you refuse to be swept off your feet unless integrity can proved to be 100% genuine. Therefore you are holding back, keeping your emotions in check because before you let down your guard you have to be sure. You are too trusting and you have no desire to be hurt again. You are responsive to conditions around you - but forever under control.

Being afraid that you may be prevented from achieving your hopes and dreams is making you anxious and nervous. As a dreamer your ideas can at times move into the realm of fantasy and you could be following that so called illusive dream.

Brrr.